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Sunday, December 9th, 2007

Time:12.9.07 - 10.02pm
this weekend started out fucking amazing.
there's no way around that.
but now i'm really upset.
i hate everything about myself.
i wish i could have the one i want.
just fucking once.
or that i could just stop fucking wanting anyone, altogether.

a tribute to every motherfucker i've ever wanted and couldn't totally have:
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Subject:fuck me
Time:12.9.07 - 6.46pm
I was five and he was six
We rode on horses made of sticks
He wore black and I wore white
He would always win the fight

Bang bang, he shot me down
Bang bang, I hit the ground
Bang bang, that awful sound
Bang bang, my baby shot me down.

Seasons came and changed the time
When I grew up, I called him mine
He would always laugh and say
"Remember when we used to play?"

Bang bang, I shot you down
Bang bang, you hit the ground
Bang bang, that awful sound
Bang bang, I used to shoot you down.

Music played, and people sang
Just for me, the church bells rang.

Now he's gone, I don't know why
And till this day, sometimes I cry
He didn't even say goodbye
He didn't take the time to lie.

Bang bang, he shot me down
Bang bang, I hit the ground
Bang bang, that awful sound
Bang bang, my baby shot me down...
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Thursday, September 28th, 2006

Time:9.28.06 - 7.37pm
it's a weird thing to come across, realizing that nobody really likes you anymore.
nobody but your boyfriend.
and it's a weird thing to come across, realizing that it doesn't even bother you that much.
i guess i'm just cool with the fact that nobody's playing pretend with me.

*to those of you that would still say you like me, thank you.
i like you too.
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Saturday, September 16th, 2006

Time:9.16.06 - 9.43am
yesterday was, and i say this in all honesty, the worst day of this year so far.
everything pissed me off/made me sad
until i went and got coffee/took a nap, later.
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Monday, August 21st, 2006

Time:8.21.06 - 8.46pm
i feel ill.
which is not okay, because i was sick enough for my entire life over the summer.
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Monday, August 14th, 2006

Time:8.14.06 - 7.00pm
school's been... okay, i suppose.
i wish it was still summer though.

part is boring as motherfucking hell. and he's a jerk, just as you said jordan.
i'm dropping ladd asap. hopefully, that means tomorrow. or before thursday, at least.
yoshida's class is the most fun evah, but i'm sad i don't have it with janel, or anyone at all really.
shabata is loads of fun. she's wack in a good way, so i'll enjoy myself.
lunch is fuckin awesome. it just is. and chombe's the queen of whipping sounds.
french has, thus far, been total bogus. honestly, she's not going to be able to control any of us.
and math. the teacher's supermegasuckass, but ryan, joanna, and christine make it amusing.
oh, then going home with eric a few times a week...
that's the best part of all.

speaking of, today we totally just layed on his bed and cuddled/napped.

oh yeah, and i did my homework, BITCHES!
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Tuesday, August 8th, 2006

Time:8.8.06 - 5.26pm
my classes are as follows:

let me know if we've got anything together.
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Friday, August 4th, 2006

Time:8.4.06 - 3.38pm
we have six days until school starts, and this is the worst that i've felt all summer.
i don't want it to end.
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Thursday, August 3rd, 2006

Time:8.3.06 - 10.28am
sometimes i get really scared of what's to come,
but then i realize that everything is going to be okay.
even if i'm mad or sad or hateful,
there's some light there at the end of it all,
and i know i'll be happy sometime,
even if it takes a while.
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Tuesday, August 1st, 2006

Time:8.1.06 - 4.03pm
tonight, i'm going to see sparta with eric. lame, maybe, but i've never heard sparta before. and as eric doesn't know [nor do many people], i can be painfully shy in certain situations. all in all, this should be very interesting.
he's getting me at 6:30
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Monday, July 31st, 2006

Time:7.31.06 - 7.42pm
you have no idea how intensly i love that boy.
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Time:7.31.06 - 12.44pm
there are a limited number of people in this world that make me genuinly happy.
the type of people who make you smile and laugh, even when you're just thinking about them.
to them, i say: thank you.
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Friday, July 28th, 2006

Time:7.28.06 - 10.08am
i had such a good dream about him last night.
it was sad for a lot of it,
because of my retarded parents,
but then he and i ran away to california together.
i love him so much.
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Thursday, July 27th, 2006

Time:7.27.06 - 10.48pm
i just got back from hanging out with miss amy.
i friggin love that girl,
even if i do persuade her to spend all her money on panties.
what a good time.
we talked about our boyfriends//problems//worries//pretty much everything//naughty things [haha]
this was a good night.
two//three more days left.
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Wednesday, July 26th, 2006

Time:7.26.06 - 8.43pm
Mood:like hell.
four/five more days?
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Time:7.26.06 - 11.44am
so this is lame,
but is anyone else bothered by how much myspace has been FAILING lately?
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Sunday, July 23rd, 2006

Time:7.23.06 - 10.09pm
no retreat, not even in sleep.Collapse )
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Thursday, July 20th, 2006

Time:7.20.06 - 10.08pm
before the sun had risen, on the carpet of a soundproof room; -i love you.- on the other line, somewhere in his own darkness; -i love you too.-Collapse )
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Monday, July 10th, 2006

Time:7.10.06 - 7.52pm
you look quite lovely when you sleep.
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Sunday, July 9th, 2006

Subject:holy shit, they bought me a car.
Time:7.9.06 - 4.18pm
today is shaping out to be quite nice!
i slept in until about 11, then i went and made myself some cinnamon toast, along with a small bowl of smart start. that stuff is so tasty. up next, it was time to check the myspace/livejournal and update my itunes. simple, but then my dad came and asked if i wanted to go car shopping with him. originally, i declined; upon my refusal though, my dad told me he would not be going without me, so i suited up to go look at cars and such.
we went to one of the dealerships my dad had visited yesterday, and test drove a dogde neon, a ford focus, a kia something or other, and something else- i don't remember specifically what it was- but none of those pleased my dad so much. then we went and drove a nisson sentra; good car for me, right there. my dad told stacy and i that we could go home, and he'd fill out all the paper work then drive it home. which made me realize my parents were actually buying me a care today. i was absolutely stoked. so stacy and i came home about an hour and a half later, my dad finally came home with my baby. clean, and sporting a full tank of gas, i went and drove it with my dad for about 20 minutes. it moves fantastically; the control is amazing, and it's really smooth and quiet. absolutely lovely. plus, it's got this nifty thing that i can plug my pod into, and i don't have to use a crazy tape thing or one of those that goes in your lighter outlet.
soon, i'll be going to dinner at my grandma's house which is always good. that grandma of mine knows how to cook like a beast. mmhm, you're jealous.
then i'm going to go hang out with eric.
i can't wait; i love him so much.
today has been so spectacular.
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LiveJournal for modern decrescendo.

View:User Info.
You're looking at the latest 20 entries. Missed some entries? Then simply jump back 20 entries.