Almost the entire time eric and i have been together, i haven't been able to help dreaming about him on a near nightly basis. For the most part, all those dreams were simple and okay, but recently [since he's been in europe], i've been having some less pleasant dreams. after last night, i have now had four dreams about cheating on eric, and it makes me hate myself just a little bit more; i always feel horrible and wake up in tears, but the fact remains that it's in my head. the first one i had was with a boy who was not my exboyfriend sean, but another boy with the same name, which i find odd. the second one was with eric's best friend nate, who i share a mutual hatred with. and the third and fourth ones were both with drew, who i haven't even thought about in a very long time. i don't know what to make of all this, and perhaps i've already gone too far; after all, they're just dreams. all the same though; i'm intensely bothered by them, and i wish they'd stop. i love eric and i'd never cheat on him, and these dreams make me feel horrible.